As of this moment I am at no feeling. I am not sure what is running through my head. I have no real idea at all. I do not know who I have feelings of love for. I do not know how I am going to get my Spanish poem done. All of this is a mere mystery to me. The only thing I precede to do is stare at my glowing computer screen in the middle of the night.
This weekend was a decent one. I made more than a couple of mistakes that I regret at this vary moment. My emotions are too raw. I need to do a better job at toning them down. Then I will be all set. I guess my role is to be a friend no more, no less.
I went through a rare event. I was just told that I do not believe in God. It is like they broke it to me. What they said made sense. I have been going to church like clock work ever since March. But God still has no place in my soul. It was suggested I never go back. I am a stubborn person, so I will give it a few more goes. I also love some of the people there too much to give up just yet. Another obstacle is...my parents will probably disown me if they get wind that I do not believe in god. I am not ready to endure that. I am just too different for that event not to be inevitable.
Now my mission is to make it through the week unharmed. Hopefully with some answers. Maybe I will find what I am looking for, but I doubt it.